Cause of Procrastination #4 - F.E.A.R.

Succumbing to our fears makes it easy for us to start putting things off, delaying action and ultimately not completing tasks and goals we set for ourselves. Fear of how we're perceived, fear of failure and fear of success can stop the chronic procrastinator dead in their tracks. But, if we're to live up to our potential, we have to "do us". We can't afford to worry about how folks will look at us or their opinions. You have to live your life and be happy with it as do they have to live theirs.

Believe it or not, many are afraid of what will happen if they reach their goals and become successful. They fear how their life might change with new responsibilities. Along with this fear comes doubt about their worthiness of what they're seeking.

"The fear of success is a very unique issue that arises when you are genuinely creating change and moving forward in your life," says Ti Caine, a hypnotherapist and life coach based in Sherman Oaks, California. "The fear of success is very real because the future is real-we're all heading there-and what we imagine for our future has an enormous influence on us."

In their most basic form, these concerns are all fears of the unknown. in fact the acronym for fear, F.E.A.R., is FALSE EXPECTATIONS APPEARING REAL. Nothing has even happened that should make us afraid, yet we're anticipating the worst. The chronic procrastinator does not know what the outcome will be or how it will affect them and this causes their thoughts to tangle and become tense. They freeze and put off any action until they are confident that they know exactly how it will come about.

Invariably, this usually results in a negative outcome and increases the depth of their fear the next time they are presented with a similar situation or opportunity. After the collapse of two businesses it took me a long time to even consider doing anything else entrepreneurial. I was afraid that if I started another venture I would lose money, be embarrassed, and end up once again starting from the bottom. Because I couldn't let go of the past, my fears began to control me. It doesn’t take long for this to become a habit of life and common way of living for those that slip into the grasp of chronic procrastination.

Cause of Procrastination #3 - Lack of Confidence

With lack of confidence as a cause for procrastination, we often have great ideas and plans but never even get them off of the ground because we don't have the confidence we can actually accomplish what we set out to do.

Essentially, what we're doing when we postpone doing things that will enrich our lives is letting our music die within us. I can't imagine all of the cures for diseases, artwork, music, books, and leadership the world has lost because the progenitor didn't have enough confidence to bring it forth.

From January through December 2006 I thought about writing a newsletter that would empower and inspire people. Everyday I considered how doing something like this would brighten people's lives and help them on their journeys to success. I talked with friends whose opinions I respected and got their feedback. To a person, all of them said that it was a great idea and they could see me writing it. They believed in my ability to motivate an audience.

The only problem was that I didn't believe it. I would say, "Who am I to write about hope, success, faith, and love?" Or, "I want to do it, but who's going to listen to me?" Another of my favorite excuses was, "Suppose I run out of material to write about?" I wrote down the reasons why I should do it and what I would talk about. My mind raced back to when I was a high school student and my writing teacher told me that I "just don't have it." Then I would convince myself that "I'll get to this tomorrow". But, "tomorrow" came and went for 365 days!

Finally, on January 2 2007, I got the nerve to go ahead and do it. I wrote my first newsletter "Take a Chance on Yourself Today!" and emailed it to 20 of my closest friends and family members. I waited nervously for their replies. I was so scared - unnecessarily so - that their feedback would be negative. Instead, the responses I got back were very encouraging. They told me that they were proud of me and that I should keep sending the newsletter. People I didn't know started to email me for advice or to request that I write about certain topics. Other publishers have asked the kid who "just didn't have it" if they could reprint my essays.

Don't worry about your plans being perfect or if you know it all. There are no flawless plans. Nobody has all the answers. The most important lessons will be learned after you get started anyway. If you'll just take a chance on yourself you might be surprised by what you can accomplish.

Causes of Procrastination #2 - Overwhelm

This is part 2 in a 4-part series on discovering why we procrastinate. To read part 1 about how perfectionism hampers us click here.

When we think about all the things we have to do on top of the things we dream about doing it can be a bit daunting. You go to work for 8-12 hours everyday, you need to make sure your kids get home safe from baseball practice, and you need to get your breaks on your car fixed. Oh, and you have to eat, too! For many of us these are just the basics of everyday life. These activities alone are enough for anyone to handle. If you're an ambitious person, or someone who just wants to change your life, you probably have goals on top of your daily responsibilities.

It's no wonder why you would brainstorm a project, draw out an outline with deadlines, get advice from people you respect, and then do...nothing. You've got way too much going on already!

The feeling of being overwhelmed can quickly lead a person to procrastinating because they don’t know what to do next. They don’t know what the most effective action to take is because there are seems to be so many things that need to be done. This can happen quickly without warning.

The person who suffers from being overwhelmed will typically be the kind of person that likes to help others, they’ll take on so much responsibility that they will suddenly freeze with inactiveness. Once the feelings of being overwhelmed take hold it is sometimes very difficult for this person to make even the simplest decisions.

This is the point where some experts might say that you need to manage your time more effectively in order to do more things. This isn't totally wrong. But, I think the most important thing to do is find balance so that you can have peace. When you're at peace your mind is clearer and there's less weight on your shoulders.

Overwhelm has definite emotional overtones which may include stress, confusion, fear, and anxiety. There are also physical signs: tightness in your chest, a knot in your stomach, and becoming short-tempered. None of those states are ideal for overcoming procrastination. Many times we are reluctant to acknowledge to ourselves or admit to others that we are feeling overwhelmed because we view it as a sign of weakness.

If you stay too long in a state of overwhelm you will eventually progress to burnout. If you learn how to recognize overwhelm, avoid it, or recover from it quickly you will not only feel better, you will likely also be more productive!

Causes of Procrastination #1 - Perfectionism

Over the last year many people have written me and told me how the dreaded "P" word, procrastination, is a big problem for them. I have also - and sometimes still do - suffered from procrastination. However, I've discovered what the causes of this "condition" are. Like any medical professional will tell you, the key to curing any ailment is to know what caused it in the first place. Throughout the next few days I'll be posting about what makes us delay important activities for so long. And then, on my last post, I'll tell you how we can overcome this hurdle.

Perfectionism

As odd and paradoxical as it seems, perfectionism is perhaps the leading cause of procrastination. The perfectionist often feels that if something is going to be done, it might just as well be done perfect or not done at all. This leaves projects or tasks either dusty in the planning stages or if they do get started, left stagnant in the early steps of development.

Perfectionism refers to a set of self-defeating thoughts and behaviors aimed at reaching excessively high unrealistic goals. Perfectionism is like a double-edged sword--it cuts both ways. Perfectionists often don't realize that they are hurting themselves by their own actions. Perfectionism is a duel with oneself, the ultimate "no-win" situation.

According to a Psychologist at Baruch College in New York, perfectionists tell themselves that their determination to be perfect will win success, acceptance, love and fulfillment, yet the opposite more often occurs. Even when perfectionists do achieve, the methods they use can deprive them of the very love and acceptance they want so badly to gain.

What ends up happening in the life of the ‘perfect procrastinator’ is they start, and then stop and they start, then stop and start. They never seem to be able to follow through and others sometimes say they are ‘underachievers.’ Being tagged with this term generally leads to even greater amounts of procrastination.

This cause debilitates the procrastinator and leads to them not moving forward in their careers or family life because some simple thing isn’t as perfect as their mind feels it should be.